Uncertainty Makes You Anxious? 3 Ways To Face The Future With Confidence

Everybody feels anxious when they’re uncertain of what’s coming. However, some of us allow anxiety take over our life. Not only does this harm our mental, physical, and emotional health, it also affects our future (for the worst). We’re usually faced with anxiety when we feel uncertainty in ourselves, like going on a first date or meeting someone new for the first time. This awful, gut-wrenching emotion is deeply rooted in all of us.

Picture yourself getting ready for an interview. You have the perfect outfit, the perfect hairstyle, and you know what to say to really win them over. All of a sudden you think of scenarios that could happen and start to feel overcome by anxiety. Before you know it, you’re trapped in a vicious cycle of feeling like you’re going to make an awful impression or not getting the job. Millions of people face anxiety like this every day. So, what can we do to avoid feeling like this?

Stop thinking of the past

Everyone has done things that they regret. It’s only human to make a few mistakes every once in awhile. Remember this: The only time you should look back in your life is to remind yourself how far you’ve come. If you continuously think that you’re going to mess something up because of past experience, chances are you will. You need to have a brighter outlook on life in order to excel.

Think of something that you’re good at

The next time anxiety strikes, instead of worrying about what will happen, take a minute to really think about what you’re good at. It might be your charismatic skills, your artistic abilities, or just knowing that you have the ability to make everyone laugh. Whatever it is, keep that thought in your head until you start to feel better. Think back to a time when you felt on top of the world. Soon enough, you’ll feel that way again. Gratitude is at the heart of the success of every great person because it works. It’s impossible to feel grateful and angry at the same time, so this one emotion could change your life forever. It’s certainly changed mine.

Don’t underestimate your self-worth

Anxiety has the power to make you feel incredibly helpless and small, and even stop you in your tracks. Never lose sight of what you deserve! You are worthy of more than you think! While anxiety is starting a war in your mind, get your worthy troops together to fight back. Anxiety may make you think that you don’t deserve to get a promotion. However, you know how much work you put in to get it. Never lose sight of how far you’ve come to be where you are today. And never stop believing in a better tomorrow. Focus on getting a little better, just 1% better, every single day. Then, you’ll be successful and happy in no time.

In conclusion

If you’re unable to see all that you have to offer, it might be a good idea to seek help. There are tons of people that you can talk to about your anxiety disorder (such as doctors, therapists, and even people that have gone through the same thing). You’re only one person, you can’t fight off all of the demons in your head by yourself. To get the future you desire, you must be at peace with your current self.

Have you ever suffered from anxiety? What helped you overcome it? I love to hear from my readers, so please drop a comment on social media. Also, share this with your friends and family if you found it helpful. You never know; they might need this more than you think and it could come to them at the perfect time.

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A Call To Women Everywhere: It Is Time to Arise and Take Back Your Glory is Now

Calling All Lionesses To Arise and Take Back Their Glory 

This one is for all the ladies out there that are sick and tired of being treated as nothing more than an object for a man’s needs and desires. The ladies out there that are tired of crying tainted tears of rejection and abandonment. The ladies out there who are desperately looking for their worth and are starting to realize it is not in the slap of her butt or the long-awaited touch of a busy man.

Distorted Image of Who We Are

No matter how much we believe we have received an equal standing with men, the reality of the matter is: we are still seen as the weakest link, the worst drivers, and as individuals whose place are at home cooking dinner and taking care of the children that we love but that we might have had before we were ready and had the opportunity to accomplish our dreams.

Unfortunately, due to our inability to see past the propaganda bombarded on top of us by the various outlets in the world today, we believe that the balance between women and men are even and that we no longer have to pay any mind to the whispering of an “Us vs Them” battle. Yet, according to the Institute for Women’s Policy Research, in 2015, women received 79 cents for every dollar earned by men – giving us a gender wage gap of 21%. It should be clear that men and women are still circling each other in the boxing ring and that the majority of women are forfeiting the fight and putting their hands up in surrender.

Catalyst, a non-profit organization with a mission to accelerate the progress of women in society, gave us a more global view on this issue. In Australia, the gender wage gap is 18%. In Germany, it is 13.4%. In Japan, it is a whopping 26.6%. In Mexico, it is 18.3%. Lastly, in the United Kingdom, it is 17.4% (we shall see what happens to this statistic as time goes by since their departure from the EU).

This is only in the workplace, but there are many other avenues where women are still subject to abuse and rejection. It seems women are under the impression that they have to succumb to the ideal picture society – which is mostly dictated by men – set out for them to be. As a result, they take extreme and many times, dangerous measures to comply to this “ideal picture.” They have to look a certain way in order to be considered beautiful and worthy. They have to own certain things in order to be considered important. Most of all, they have to behave and think in a certain way in order to avoid being rejected and labeled as “odd”.

Where Has Our Sense of Equality Gone?

What has happened to the spirit of the lioness fighting to find her voice amidst the curses of the repelled man wanting to contain and imprison the wonder that is woman? What has happened to the unity we use to have as lionesses, working towards a cause that is brighter for us all? Today, we would rather spend time criticizing and breaking each other down in order to feel better. We would rather spend time begging a man to give us a few minutes of his time and attention, even if that means changing who we are in the process.

It is jaw-dropping to see the level we have sunk to as roaring and influential individuals, but most of all, it is terrifying to watch how we have forgotten the legacy of the powerful women fighting for the “equality” we have today. Yet, the pivotal point that truly alarms me is the legacy we are leaving for our daughters, our sisters, our nieces – the generation of tomorrow. I look at what follows us and I am morbidly saddened – they are looking at our ways of doing and thinking, and they are naively and innocently repeating it.

Can we stand proud at the example we are giving them? Can we really stand blameless in the face of all the unwanted teen pregnancies and suicide – all the physical and emotional abuse that young women are suffering under today?

It Is In Our Hands, Now Arise

Ladies, it is time to remember our worth.

It is time to remember the roaring lionesses that we are and that no one in their right mind would dare mess with. It is time that we stop our bickering and criticizing, come together in unity and teach the cubs – and by cubs, I mean the girls and the boys of tomorrow – that they are worthy and influential beyond measure. We should teach them that there is absolutely nothing wrong or “faulty” with the way they look and act, that the thing that makes them stand out as unique individuals, is also the thing that will make them an invincible force of nature.

We have to get out of our selfish bubble of comfort and start thinking about tomorrow. Let us not abandon the responsibility we have towards the future. Let us start arising with the knowledge that we are powerful forces of light made to demolish darkness, we have a mission, a purpose – let us start to live it!

Featured photo credit: Cara Delevingne via xtrafondos.com

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7 Tips To Speed Up Your Slow Smartphone

We’ve all been there. That dreaded moment when we look down at our phone, press the Home button, and nothing happens. Nothing. Zip. Nada.

You think to yourself: “It’s only 1 PM. How can my phone be dead already?!” or “Great, now how am I going to procrastinate at work?”

Have you ever been playing Angry Birds on your phone and it all of sudden freezes up and you lose the level you’ve been trying win for the past ten minutes?

Whether it is in the office (even if you shouldn’t be on your phone) or on the bus ride home, no one wants their phone to lose its charge or freeze up randomly. It’s the plight of today’s modern world. We want our phones to do everything, but that’s when they stop running smoothly and start lagging. AnTuTu benchmark reports that the iPhone 7 Plus is the best in terms of performance. Maybe, that phone won’t lag till the new millennia begins.

The good news for phone addicts is that there are some easy ways to speed up your phone and keep it running forever. Follow these tips and you’ll never be phone-less again.

1. Get rid of those old games you don’t play anymore

We’ve all felt the urgent need to download a game (Angry Birds or Candy Crusher) and beat it immediately. No point in denying it. It’s okay. Let’s accept it and move on.

Those birds may be cute, but the drain on your smartphone battery and storage space the games create isn’t so cute. Gaming apps like these, and other unnecessary apps, not only use your battery life while you’re playing them, they can often keep running in the background even when you’re not defeating all those bad guys.

And you’re going to have less storage, which will slow down your phone, making it even harder to pass level 22.

What are you waiting for? Delete those old games you have taking up space on your phone and get out there to save the world in real life!

2. Please, for the love of your phone, update your software

Arguably (read: inarguably) one of the worst moments in all of our lives is when we pick up our phone and read the dreaded message:

There is one software update available. Would you like to update now?

Even the new iPhone needs to be updated in a few months. (Sickening, right?) It takes all but one second to click “Later” or “Not Right Now”. (It really won’t be, will it? I always click that button as an excuse to just make it go away.)

However, take some advice from the experts and just download the update already. Software updates come with some great things that keep your phone running smoothly until the next update comes.

3. Bid adieu to the background activity

Let’s do a little hands-on activity.

Pick up your phone. Check how many apps you have running the background. Is your WiFi on, even though there’s no chance of you finding free WiFi around? How’s that data chug going?

One of the first steps to admitting you have a phone performance problem is looking that problem in the eyes and saying, “I see you background apps. I’m not afraid to close you.”

Swiping up to make those apps go away and turning off unnecessary functions like WiFi and Bluetooth is going to give you a much smoother experience on your phone. Say bye-bye to performance hogs!

At least, until you turn them on again five minutes from now. *sigh*

4. Do some spring cleaning

Do you really need that video of the fireworks show from your cousin’s birthday party from five years ago or that once-hilarious meme you’ve had in storage for weeks and months?

Take some time and really do some cleaning up on your phone, similarly to what you do with your laptop/desktop. Even if you deleted the unnecessary apps from a couple steps ago, you probably still have tons of old photos and files that you can still throw out.

A little Smartphone spring cleaning is good every once in a while!

5. Give your phone some nap time

Our phones are just like us and by that I mean they get pretty tired if we keep them running 24/7. Unless you give them some “coffee,” i.e. plugging them in and charging them.

However, even charging isn’t enough sometimes. They need some “nap time” every once in a while, to keep running smoothly. Same as us. For your phone, a “nap” means turning it completely off for a few hours.

Hard as this may be, it’s time to turn off your phone if you aren’t using it for an extended period of time. Ever notice how your internet connection is faster after you haven’t had it on for a while? It’s the same concept here.

6. Go all the way and do a factory reset

If you really just can’t figure out what’s making your smartphone run at the pace of a seventy-year-old snail, you could do a factory reset. For those of you who don’t know, a factory reset is giving your phone a clean slate. That means resetting your phone completely by clearing off everything that is currently on it. Be sure to have all apps, music, photos, contact info backed up so that you can restore your phone afterwards.

Trust me, it sounds a lot scarier than it actually is. It’s the severest medicine you can give to your phone and it usually works!

7. Put away the bells and whistles

Unless you’re living under a rock in the flip-phone world, most of our phones have animations and fancy wallpapers to enhance our smartphone experience if we want them.

But do you really need to see goldfish swimming around in the background on your live wallpaper you just downloaded from Google?

If you’re really serious about speeding up your phone, it won’t kill you to turn off these fancy bells and whistles. Go to your phone’s Settings and from there, it will be easy to help your phone breathe a little easier.

Last Thoughts

It’s a smart idea to do a bit of analysis on your phone to determine which apps are using the most data, storage, or battery life.

To do this, just head to your Settings. From here, you can check on your favorite apps and see which ones you might need to cut ties with or at least distance yourself from. (RIP Snapchat!)

So you’ve deleted the hundreds of pictures of your dog on your phone, and even the latest version of Angry Birds, you should be proud of yourself! Give yourself a good digital pat on the back.

Your smartphone should be running a lot more smoothly now. Go over these tips every couple of weeks or so to make sure you keep your phone in tip-top shape.

Featured photo credit: via pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Should You Buy Auto Insurance Online or Use an Agent? We Help You Choose

There is a significant shift going on in the insurance industry. For decades, most people have purchased their policies through agents and brokers. Now our television sets are flooded with commercials from direct insurers that sell coverage online, making the need for real-life agents more and more obsolete. But this, however, brings up the debate, who has better rates?

Let’s take a closer look at both methods of buying car insurance and compare the results:

1. Getting Online Auto Insurance Quotes

The easiest way to secure an insurance quote for your vehicle is online. With sites like Good 2 Go, you can compare up to 10 quotes in about five minutes. Think about that for a minute. All you have to do when you are buying auto insurance online is enter some basic background information about the make and model of your vehicle and your location and you will be given multiple quotes.

There is no need to call several agents for quotes when you go direct. After all, that could take hours. You can get quoted in the comfort of your home, even in your pajamas while drinking your cup of coffee. You have control of the entire process and can remain completely anonymous.

Another big reason why people like getting online quotes is because of privacy. Most people don’t like aggressive sales people trying to sell “padded” policies with a commission in mind.

Often, the drawback to getting auto insurance online is not buying enough coverage. Many people only focus on price and not the amount of insurance they need in order to be adequately covered. An agent can analyze a person’s income and vehicle and then make recommendations about the insurance limits needed. This one-on-one advice is also really valuable to people that are not well-versed in auto insurance.

2. Getting Auto Insurance Quotes from Agents

If you want a professional insurance advisor, then call an agent or broker. The quoting process will be a bit longer than an online quote form, but you will get a detailed analysis from a pro. Agents are essentially the “middleman” and represent the company they work for. For example, a State Farm agent will give you exclusive quotes from State Farm while a Farmers agent will do the same. This is why going the agent route can be time-consuming. You need to call several company agents and answer the same questions over and over again to find the quote that works for you.

When you apply for online quotes with direct online sources, your information is sent to multiple providers and quotes are provided in just a few minutes.

The main advantage of using an agent is the free consultation. It is like having a personal insurance advisor that helps you find a plan and coverage that is best for you. Many people form long-term relationships with their agents. When a claim is filed, most people prefer to talk to someone they trust and that already knows their profile. It does not always happen, but agents sometimes find deals for their clients that save them more than direct insurers.

3. What is the Best Option for Buying Auto Insurance?

If you need a policy fast and are on a tight budget, I would go the direct route and buy insurance online via an online quote. Check out sites like Good 2 Go auto insurance and get a free quote. When you get a quote online, there is no obligation to buy a policy and you don’t even need to talk to anyone. Make sure you compare at least 10 online rates. This may or possibly may not be the best price for the coverage you want, so after gathering your quotes to choose from, follow the next step.

The next step is to call up an agent. Select the best direct quote from your online insurance quotes you are thinking of buying and ask the agent if they can match that price. This will give you all the leverage and show that you have done your homework. Agents are in business to make sales and they will usually go out of their way to match your price. If they can’t, then call up another agent. Make at least five agent phone calls to see if they can match or even beat the direct rate.

After that, it all boils down to pricing and customer service. If you find an agent that gives you a rate that is equal to or almost equal to the online companies and are in need of that extra professional quote, then go for it. If you enjoy convenience and you do not like talking to agents, go online and buy directly.

The choice is yours, but be sure to get the best coverage for your vehicle at the lowest possible price.

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4 Mistakes People Easily Make That Stop Them From Achieving Big Goals

Most people have big dreams. But are they just dreams or real goals? What stops them from truly committing and achieving big goals?

If you’ve seen people talk about big goals and never really accomplishing them, it’s quite a common occurrence. The reality is that there are a lot of factors that stop people from achieving big goals. It all has to do with having the wrong mindset. The wrong mindset is often the result of committing four mistakes that easily cause achieving big goals to become an unaccomplished feat. In order to increase your chances in being successful with your goals, let’s dive into the four mistakes you should avoid:

1. Competing with those at the same level as us

It is human nature to do what’s easy! If you’re a golfer, you’ll compete with those at the same level as you. If you’re a small business, you’ll compete with other small businesses in the same industry as you. The results, therefore, are sub-optimal as you’ll only make incremental improvements to your overall performance.

Therefore the cure is to compete with those who are a lot better than you are. Challenging yourself is the only way to accelerate your learning. So if you’re an amateur golfer, play with professional golfers, and you’ll start to notice the difference in your game over time. Never stagnate, always make an attempt to consciously be around those who are better than you to make yourself uncomfortable in a congenial setting and you’ll be on your way to fast development and progress.

So make a list of people who you aspire to be like. Email them, reach out to them on Twitter, and set up coffee meetings with them. Find opportunities to be around them and invite them to social events. You can’t go wrong!

2. Only relying on our own ability to make progress towards our goals

This is the behavior we default to as we think we can do it alone. The reality is that no matter how tough and capable you think you are, you can never achieve your goals without a little help. So never hesitate to ask for help when it’s needed.

If you’re trying to build a business, for instance, could you leverage the knowledge and experience of mentors who have “been there and done that”? This could help save heaps of precious time that we would spend making mistakes by relying on our own abilities. It’s of course important not to underestimate your own uniqueness and abilities, to always have a questioning mind and not just blindly follow those who are better. But, it’s also important to take their inputs because without them, you will only delay your own progress.

Make it a point to understand that you don’t know everything. For every problem you have, think about who else out there could have been in the same situation as you and how they overcame it? Reach out to them and seek their help this very moment! Take action.

3. Hiding what we know from others

Think about it, when you have knowledge that could potentially be beneficial, you end up keeping it to yourself, internalizing it, and as a result, nothing ever gets done. You also, over time, will forget what you learn and the knowledge just becomes something you “know” and do nothing about.

If you truly want to learn, you need to tell people what you know. It’s scientifically proven that teaching people solidifies the knowledge in your brain and helps you retain the knowledge. By sharing your goals with others, you also attract more support from your colleagues, friends, and family, and you clearly get to know who your supporters are! This can be a great way of creating alliances with people who are aligned with your vision and your goals and learn from each other, building meaningful relationships that go a long way in achieving big goals!

Don’t be scared of sharing your goals and knowledge!

4. Setting really long time frames for making changes

Most people think life is just way too long and end up setting lazy targets. We are told “success takes time” and words like “just have a lot of patience,” and then we rely on fate and time by thinking it will all work out. It’s certainly important to have faith, but, you shouldn’t rely on it!

Make sure you have a big goal, and then set small, more achievable milestones towards the big goal that are time bound. Doing this ensures you’re on track and helps you evaluate your progress by having metrics and timelines to measure yourself against. You can’t take forever to achieve your goals, and you have to be aggressively patient, not just patient.

While most mistakes people make are mindset-related, you can correct them by being around people who are where you want to be in life. By being intentional about who you choose to associate with, depending on your longer term goals, you will be on the path to actually making your dreams and your goals a reality.

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If You Want To Be Happy, Healthy And Successful, Start Doing These 10 Things Now

We all want to be happy, healthy, and successful, but aren’t always sure how to do it. You do things here and there to improve your quality of life, but you seem to lack consistency. For example, if you want to feel happy, you may go for a hike, hang out with friends, or have a weekend getaway. To be healthier you may join the gym, take yoga classes, change your eating habits, etc. All of those things are great to do, however, it might be more helpful to look a little bit deeper than the short-term and find habits that stick.

Take a look at these 10 things you can start doing today to get you on the right track:

1. Make a bucket list and tackle it

Sit down and think about all the things you want to do before you die. Want to travel to another country? Skydive? Learn a new language? Whatever it is, write it down. Make a 30-day bucket list as well as a 5-year bucket list. Often times people tend to live as though they’ll live forever. They sink into “tomorrow” and end up with a lot of yesterdays that are filled with a whole lot of nothing. Don’t plan your ambitions around your life, plan your life around your ambitions.

2. Do a 24-hour internet detox

In today’s world, almost everything that we do is through the internet or a mobile device. You can become easily wrapped up in other people’s lives and forget about your own. Think about how often you go out to eat and see others on their phone and not talking to the person they’re supposed to be sharing their meal with. By detoxing yourself from the internet for 24 hours a week, you give yourself the opportunity to reconnect with the people you love and care about most. By putting your phone away, you’re able to give your undivided attention to your loved ones and form stronger bonds with them.

3. Be selective in what you read in newspapers

Most times, the media is pumping out information to get your attention and appeal to your fears. If they didn’t do this, most newspapers would fail because no one would be reading them. You can get a lot of accurate information from Google News. When you separate yourself from public news, you’ll be surprised at how much more optimistic your life will become. Occasionally, we fall into perceived realities when we are constantly filling our brain with the information we read in newspapers which can, and often times is, extremely toxic.

4. Do something daily that scares you

It is very easy to live in our comfort zones. It is our safe place, and it is where we escape to when we feel uncomfortable. You don’t need to do something drastic that scares you every day. Small things can make a big difference as well. If you’re able to take 20 seconds out of your day every day to do something that terrifies you, you’ll realize you’ll be in a completely different socioeconomic situation.

Ever notice how you’re always more nervous for a meeting or an event until it actually happens? The anticipation is far worse than the situation itself when it comes around. It’s important to remind yourself that most things out of your comfort zone are completely safe.

5. Do something kind every day

Ask yourself, “Have I done anything good for the world or another person today?” You’re busy, I’m busy, everyone is busy, I get it. But if you allow yourself to become so busy that you cannot take any time out of your day to help another person, you should make some adjustments so that you can make that a priority. Whether it is spontaneous or planned, you will realize that one of the greatest feelings in life is being able to help others. When you help others, you give yourself the ability to open up to them in a way you may not have been able to before. It can truly put into perspective what really matters in life.

6. Get rid of the things you don’t need

Start with your closet. You have probably looked in there countless mornings and said, “I have nothing to wear.” But you clearly have a ton of things to wear. Inside is probably a ton of clothing items you haven’t worn in months, maybe even years. It’s like money sitting in your closet. When you start getting rid of the things you don’t need, you’ll start to notice how much more motivated you feel. When you get rid of old energy, you open the doors for new and positive energy to come through.

7. Believe in your dreams

At one point or another, we have all dreamed of a life we’d love to live – from material items to all the things that money can’t buy. When you come to the realization and understanding that the things you seek can occur, the universe will work in very mysterious ways to make that happen.

8. Stop focusing so much on the outcome

Many times we find ourselves focusing so much on what could happen rather than just living in the moment and enjoying it for what it is. We do this because we really don’t want to mess something up. It can either be a relationship or work-related, but we can sometimes create negative outcomes when we focus so much on what hasn’t happened yet. Focus on the things that you can control. Better yet, focus on who you can control – yourself. Do what is right and let the consequences follow.

9. Surround yourself with people who inspire you

Have you ever heard someone say to you that you tend to act like the five people you spend the most time with? That is very, very true.

• What goals do they have?
• What kind of beliefs do they have?
• Are they a kind person?

These are just a few things that dramatically impact you. Becoming uncomfortable around people you’ve been friends with for a very long time can be very tough to grasp. It’s normal for people to grow, evolve, and realize that they may desire to hang around a different crowd. It’s okay to move on, but don’t detach from the genuine love that you have for those people.

10. Read weekly

It’s very important to always keep learning. Even the smartest and most successful people in the world still feel that they can always learn something new. Try to read one book per week. As time passes, you will have read hundreds of books and you will have gained knowledge on a number of topics. You’ll then have the ability to see the world differently, as well as open the doors to communicate with more people due to your knowledge on various things.

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7 Secrets Of Success From Tony Robbins That Will Lead To A More Successful Life

Tony Robbins – he is the man. You know who he is, I know who he is. As a businessman, author, philanthropist, and motivational speaker, Tony Robbins has been helping people change their lives and improve for the better for the past 30 years. Best known for his self-help books, Unlimited Power and Unleash the Power within, Robbins has made millions of dollars, and helped business owners and regular people make money.

Here are 7 secrets to a successful life that can be learned from Tony Robbins and his career:

1. Mindfulness

To practice mindfulness, Tony has been channeling his energy by using practices that have been around for more than millennia and used by cultures around the world, and for good reason. They lower blood pressure, reduce anxiety, and improve overall health. It’s no wonder Tony uses priming exercises every morning!

One such practice is called Enlightenment, which began in India more than 2,500 years ago.

2. Raise Standards

Change comes from inside. It doesn’t matter what you do in life, you are not going to improve yourself unless you change and change begins within. Who gives a damn about achieving goals if you aren’t fulfilled when you do?

Fulfill yourself by setting your standards way above what you think you can do.

3. Reset Mind & Mood

Tony has made the distinction between peak performance and poor performance clear and believes the difference is the state your body and mind is in.

If your body and mind aren’t synced, your performance will suffer, and you won’t go anywhere. Think about times you’re sad, depressed, or feel like giving up – how productive are you? Do you feel like moving, or doing anything? I certainly don’t.

It’s important to recognize when you’re in a sour mood and evaluate your body’s posture. Are you slouched over? Stand up straight. Sporting a frown? Why not try faking a smile? How we feel reflects how we stand – it’s that link between our brain and our body. That’s why confident, happy people (such as Tony Robbins) are always upright.

4. Let Go

There’s no way you can completely let go of a past that’s scarred you. When someone’s wronged us, we tend to hold onto that for years and years and years. Time passes and that grudge has seeded so deep in our subconscious that they affect us without our realizing it.

We’re keeping all of the negative energy balled up in us, right? So, let it go. The past can’t be changed and what happened to you is not the you that you are today. It doesn’t affect your outcome today. So, let go.

It’s time to face reality: the past can’t be changed. Sure, you can look at the bad things that have happened you differently, but at the end of the day, they still can’t be changed. Center your time and focus on what you’re doing now to make a more efficient you for tomorrow.

Realize your sense of worth by evaluating what is important to you. What do you enjoy doing?

5. Look Confident

You know the conventional wisdom, “Don’t judge a book by its cover?” As good as it is, it’s pure bologna. People form impressions and opinions of you the moment they see you. They make judgments about the way you move, the way you walk, talk, and breathe.

How are your shoulders? If they’re slouched or crouched, fix them. Align your spine upright.

Do you tend to fidget a lot? Play with your hands, clothes, hair, or constantly shift? These movements give you the air that you’re uncomfortable, which is bad news in the eyes of people who seek to judge you.

How’s your eye contact? Holding eye contact in conversations is a tremendously successful way of showing two things: 1) You’re actively listening to what’s being said, and 2) You’re not afraid. Most people look down, off to the side, or anywhere except who they’re talking to.

Standing like Superman for two minutes changes you psychologically, too. When you feel more capable handling situations, you start believing in yourself – and your thoughts change. Why? Body language.

Body language is a subtle communication between people. That’s why some of the most successful executives seem larger than life – their confidence is astronomical because of their body language. This gives their communication so much meaning.

People will sense this, on a subconscious level, and respect you more because you’re giving them non-verbal cues that you know exactly what you’re worth, as well as what you’re doing.

6. Handle Stress

Believe it or not, how most people handle emotions can be summed up in four basic ways:

1. We avoid them. We mentally, spiritually, and emotionally shut ourselves off to what’s happening and refuse to admit what’s going on. Some people often do this to not feel anything at all. Happiness, sadness, stress – they run from it. This keeps people from experiencing honest love when it’s right in front of them and keeps them in a shell, cutting off the very things life is made of.
2. We deny them. No! No! No! We don’t believe we’re experiencing those negative emotions, like a loved one’s passing. This restraint often multiplies in intensity, and the stronger you bottle those emotions up, what happens? That’s right, you explode and lose control of yourself.
3. We compete with the misery of other people. How many times, when someone’s shared an experience with you, you tried to one-up them? Say your friend lost their puppy. “Oh yeah?” We say, “That’s tragic. Reminds me of the time I lost my baby.” Or what about the time someone in your life had something incredible to them? A lot of people, from whom I’ve talked to, couldn’t let it happen. So, they shared their own experiences of happiness, instead of letting their friend enjoy the bonus. This competition helps nobody. It’s fruitless and isn’t the path to spiritual, or emotional growth.
4. They learn from pain, and they learn from stress to better themselves – to challenge themselves and find those incremental shifts in perception, to handle situations later down the road. This is the truth: problems, sorrows, and obstacles are hidden “secrets” the universe puts before us to get farther in life.

7. Control Emotions

Controlling our emotions is no easy feat and it’s a struggle a lot of us deal with everyday. The amount of people in the world who don’t realize their potential and aren’t fulfilled because they don’t believe in themselves, and are divorced or their spouse leaves and their job performance is suffering – it’s enough to make anybody crack. And the more I realize this, the more I see this with my own eyes, the harder it is for me to see. I break down.

That’s why a super-fast way to take control of my emotions (and you can too) is by:

• Identifying what I’m feeling.
• Acknowledging these emotions, and thanking God I’m still alive to feel.
• Figuring out what’s going on: I’m experiencing this for a reason, right? What is this reason.
• Remembering how you’ve gotten over it before.
• Knowing we can handle this emotion in the future, again, by dealing with it today.

Conclusion

If none of this works for you (are you honestly applying yourself?), head over to Netflix and watch Tony’s “I Am Not Your Guru” documentary. The film is an extraordinary, first-hand glimpse into the magic of Tony’s powerful seminars and will have you finding success on your own terms.

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Why You Should Cherish People Who Hold You To A Higher Standard

Have you ever stopped and thought about the people in your life? Are they all the same sorts of people? How do they influence what you do or how you think about yourself and the world around you? It’s often quoted that we are the average of the five people we spend our time with, so what kind of people do you choose to be around?

Have you ever considered that the quality of your life and the quality of your work are a direct result of the standards you have for yourself and the standards of those around you?

Do You Think About Who You Spend The Most Time With?

Most of us pick up friends out of proximity to where we are at a particular time. Whether they are friends we know from school, work, or the activities we do most, we tend to choose to spend the most time with people we see easily on a regular basis.

Not only that but, as humans, we always want to make friends and spend time with people that praise, appreciate, and recognize us. This seems obvious because we all want to feel loved and accepted without any hassle or feelings of criticism, but is this helping our growth and development as a person?

Why The “Harsh” Friend Is Better For You Than You Think

Shying away from people that are seen as harsh or critical might be doing you more harm than good. This isn’t about spending time with selfish, manipulative, and hurtful people we all encounter from time to time, instead it’s about surrounding yourself with friends that tell you the honest truth and who don’t feel the need to sugarcoat their opinions – especially when they feel it will encourage you to grow.

These are the people who are actually holding you to a higher standard. They are the people who believe you can do better, who believe in you to do better. They are the ones who always have your best interests at heart and steer you into a direction that you might not have seen or wanted to see.

I always had the same group of friends who I loved – they would tell me how great I was, they always agreed with my opinions, they always told me I looked beautiful without makeup when I felt insecure in myself. But there was always one friend who challenged what I said, would give me their honest opinion that I would sometimes interpret as harsh, condescending, or critical, but as a result I never felt so close with her.

As I got older, I soon realized that what she was doing wasn’t critical, it was just that I wasn’t used to hearing the truth and I wasn’t used to being challenged. I saw it as a knock to my ego rather than an opportunity for growth.

Why You Should Surround Yourself With People Who Have Higher Standards Than You

If you want to improve and succeed in your life, whether personally or in your career, surrounding yourself with people who hold you to a higher standard can do more wonders for your self-improvement and personal growth than you realize. These people aren’t the ones we should avoid or escape from, but instead we should cherish them for the unexpected growth they can provide us with.

So, don’t neglect those that love us dearly and tell us everything we want to hear, but also don’t neglect the people in our lives that sometimes tell us what we don’t want to hear. Your life is a reflection of your standards and how much you develop yourself can simply be  down to who you are venting your opinions to and who is telling you honestly how things really are.

Don’t let your ego get in the way of facing your limiting beliefs, limited perspectives about yourself, and what you’re capable of. Cherish those that elevate your thinking and energy. Don’t take what they say to heart but rather, take what they say mindfully and consider using it to push yourself and raise your game. They are not there to criticize, they are there to teach you something about yourself you weren’t aware of.

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